I’m Confused and Hurt
Q: I have been dating my boyfriend for almost a year ( we’ve known eachother for over 20) and he lives 3.5 hours away now. It was all good until the last few months. He goes periods of time without calling or texting, when I am on the road coming to visit him or even before he I leave he calls and tells me not to come. He is completely pushing me away. He has just completed his graduate work and convenietly forgot to tell me about his graduation but I see pictures of it and a party he had on facebook from other mutual friends that were there.
He was in town for one or twice and didn’t even stop by before leaving town. he called to let me know he was there but I never saw him ( his family still lives in the same city as I do). What is going on? When I asked him he says he loves me but does not love the distance. He assures me that nothing is going on he just hates long distance relationships. This is a stark change from us seeing eachother every weekend the first 9 months (both of us driving). What happenend? I feel like this is another one of my train wreck relationships! I am a basket case lately…..I rarely let anyone in, before him it had been 2 years since I had dated (needed to find myself). Now I am confused and hurt and angry. I love him. Have had a crush on him since we were 10 but I feel like if I continue like this I will be hurt again and end up hating him. Help me! What should I do?
How To Make a Long Distance Relationship Work
If you are wondering how to make a long distance relationship work, this entire blog is dedicated to that. From tips for loneliness, to keeping the lines of communication open, to avoiding the post-visit meltdown, to dealing with unsupportive friends and family; this blog has it all so sit down, grab a cup of coffee and read the archives.
If you have already done that, but you are looking for something new, here’s a little write up on How To Have a Successful Long Distance Relationship.
Follow the steps and you’ll have a pretty good chance of having a long lasting relationship…provided that it was meant to be.
But take heed; skeptics, cheaters, and liars might as well skip over reading it.
I Need a Distraction
Q: I just got back from a visit. I am sad. How do I distract myself from being sad?
A: There are lots of things that you can do. It depends on what your interests are.
Take up a new hobby- crocheting, working out, computer repair.
Start a new project- a scrapbook, a website, running a marathon.
Join a club- there are clubs and organizations for every type of interest. Go to Meetup.com and search your area.
Just keep busy, but not so busy that you don’t have time for talking to your SO.
Good luck!
How Often Should We Talk On the Phone?
Q: My boyfriend has a stressful job and he is busy. I get it but I since this is long distance I feel like we should talk to each other. He gets days off and he just wants to relax and that’s cool but his relaxing doesn’t include talking to me. We hardly ever talk! Am I crazy for feeling mad? Did you expect to talk to your partner everyday while you were away?
A: Yes, we spoke every day. Through tiredness, sickness, being busy, relaxing, and whatever else life threw at us. Maybe we only had 5 or 10 minutes, but that 5 or 10 minutes each day was very special to us.
Tell him how you feel without being accusatory. Tell him that you’d like to communicate with him more often. His response will indicate whether he’s really into you or not.
Random Acts of Kindness
Do something sweet for your sweetheart today.
Send them a just because card.
If you are low on cash, send them a thoughtful e-card.
Even better, write them a letter telling them how much you miss them.
If you have a webcam, send them a video of you. Get your mind out of the gutter because I mean a video saying how much you miss them. Please, keep your clothes on.
Little acts of kindness go a long way. They’ll make you feel better too!
Welcome to Long Distance Diva
Need advice on your long distance relationship? Get it from someone who understands.
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